So, as I sat this Sunday at the breakfast table, I began to ask David questions. Elementary as they were, God used them to reveal a misguided thinking in my life. I felt God was at war against me, because I was viewing my life as 80% bad and 20 % good. As I began to weigh everything in my mind, it all added up to this: Bad>Good=Therefore God is not good. This, my friend, could not be farther from the truth! Think of it like a bar graph. It seemed to me there was a bar of 80% bad and a bar that went up to 20% that was good. But, this is the reality: God=Good. There is not two different bars in the graph, there is just one, and it is three-d. And one side, the limited side, I can only see. But, God can see the whole graph. I can not charge God with having limited sight and me unlimited; I cannot say that this situation is bad and that God does not understand . He sees everything, he knows everything, AND HE IS GOOD. This is not bad what is happening to me, but good! I am so limited in my knowledge that I must trust and rely on God's knowledge. I say again, Anxiousness is rooted in unbelief, and unbelief in the ignorance of who God is! I must know that God knows everything, can accomplish anything, and that he is in control of everything. Standing on these bases will aid my heart!
Also, let me say that at this time, God has revealed many things to me that I believed would "fix" my problem, but when they didn't, I felt like I failed. A few for example: I need to confess more, I need to give more, I need to whatever it is. These things are all good, but I cannot use them as a ladder to get to God. I think one problem I had was that every time God would reveal something to me, I would think, "Oh this is it, this is my problem. This will make everything better." Then I would go and try to fix my life; these things were not fixing my problem. Nothing was! This is because God has me here! He has me here for my good. I can't work my way out of this! I may not ever know why God has me here, or maybe I will find out tomorrow, or maybe a year from now, but what I know today is that God is good and is working all things out for my good! Hark, raise your trumpet with me friend! Let us yell with our lives that God is good! The will of God is never exactly what you expect it to be. It may seem to be much worse, but in the end it's going to be a lot better and a lot bigger. --Elisabeth Elliot